#050 - Why We Lie to Our Friends about How We're Really Doing

November 06, 2022 00:05:47
#050 - Why We Lie to Our Friends about How We're Really Doing
Unfeigned Christianity
#050 - Why We Lie to Our Friends about How We're Really Doing

Nov 06 2022 | 00:05:47

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Hosted By

Asher Witmer

Show Notes

Today, we're looking at chapter 3 of Live Free, "Why We Lie to Our Friends about How We're Really Doing"

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 0 00:00:00 All right. Hello, friends. As Whitmer with UNFI Christianity, welcome back to my review of my own book, Live Free Making Sense of Male Sexuality. We're celebrating the four year anniversary of it, and there are some things that I would say it differently. If you miss the first, uh, episodes of this, whether on the podcast or video on YouTube or Facebook or the blog, go ahead and click the link below. You'll be able to access all of 'em. You can start at the beginning, kind of give a little rundown of why I'm doing this, and also part of why we're doing it, celebrating the anniversary, but also getting ready for the release of the audio version of Live Free. It's four years in the making. It's a bit of an embarrassing part of the Project <laugh>, but it's finally coming. Anyways, today we are looking at chapter three, Why We Lie to our Friends about how we're really doing, and this is, this chapter is just trying to unpack like what makes us, So in the last chapter, we talked about not talking and wondering if we're the only ones. Speaker 0 00:01:03 This chapter is trying to unpack, like what makes us not talk, what keeps us from, from not talking, and those lies that we can end up believing about ourselves or even about life. That frees us from telling our story, which is actually the first and one of the most important steps in finding freedom. And so I compare it to, uh, I, I played high school baseball growing up, and one year especially, there was a team that we did not play well in during the regular season, and we came into the playoffs against them, and like the whole warmup and prep before the game, like we were, we were all kind of down on ourselves. Like the, the whole conversation was just like, Oh, man, like they're, they were bigger than us. We were kinda young, nine and 10th graders, and they were seniors and they were a lot bigger. Speaker 0 00:01:56 And, but then for a good two, three innings, we were neck and neck with them. We were playing well, but then all of a sudden our shortstop made an air, and then he tried to over overcompensate for making up for that one and made another air. And then different ones of us started striking out more often, and it just wasn't a very good outcome. They ended up beating us and they moved on to playoffs. We went home and just how sometimes our defeat, we ensure defeat simply because we're so obsessed with the last time when we failed, rather than starting a new, And, and in sports, you hear this, it's, it's almost a cliche. It almost doesn't even have much meaning, but it's, it, you know, that's in the past we're gonna start with a new slate, you know, it's a new day. Go out and do a new thing. And, and that, that's so important. The, the teams that go deep Speaker 1 00:02:58 Into playoffs are the teams who can, after a loss, they start over and they go right back out and win again. But when they're down on themselves and then you get in this slump and you start racking up multiple losses, then you get depressed and there's no hope. And so to translate that to a journey of sexual purity, what are the, the lies that we believe that cause us to not tell anybody? I think for, for me, a lot of it is, you know, the devil will point out that last time that I failed, and then c, you're not, you're not actually who you say you are or you're not actually free or a Christian or whatever God, God's spirit actually is in, in, because you're being tempted in this way. That's a, that's a big one. And boy, that's, that's a lie that we really gotta unpack because that is not true. Speaker 1 00:04:01 Okay? There are, there are reasons sexual sexualized content is exciting you, and there's emotional, there's physical, and then there's spiritual reasons sometimes too, why these things are captivating us. And there, there are reasons that we can do something about, And it's not just that, like when you come to faith in Jesus or if the Holy Spirit were to fill you enough, then all of a sudden no longer would the, the shot of dopamine that a sexual arousal gives you no longer, Would that feel exciting? No. The holiest, most godly person is going to be sexually excited when there's something arousing that's happened and dopamine is released in his brain. Like that's, that's a reality of our bodies. And so the, but the devil will try to use us and trap us into these lies. I'm curious. I don't, I didn't, It's a short chapter. I didn't notice anything that I would say differently. Speaker 1 00:05:07 I think I said in the last video, it's, it's the later chapters that I think about things that I would, I would say it differently, but I'd be, I'd love to hear from you, first of all, is there anything that you have questions about or you're like, I'm not sure about this, but then also what lies keep you, or maybe you've worked with other people, you have friends with other people, and, and you've noticed that there are certain lies that keep them from telling their story. That's specifically what we're targeting is the, the things that hold us back from opening up, because that's a crucial piece to starting a journey of freedom.

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